Super Smash Bros. Brawl

I got Super Smash Bros. Brawl for my birthday a year ago.  I played the game for a bit before discarding it for another year (and then some).  This is because Steve and Dustin had already unlocked all the characters/stages and I had no desire to do so myself.  I tried to get their data copied to my Wii’s hard drive but Nintendo thought that was a stupid idea (data can not be transfered or some bs).  Robbed of $60 and really pissed off, I buried the game…until a recent staycation and I decided to undertake the grueling task unlock the characters/stages.

It’s taken 10+ hours (and I still need to play as Kirby and Donkey Kong 20 times…each…to unlock the last two stages) but whatever.

Anyway, the easiest way to unlock all the characters was to trek through Subspace Emissary.  SE is a more fleshed-out Adventure mode that was introduced in Melee.  It has some partial platforming elements with a few fights thrown in.  What’s different this time is that there’s an attempt of a story here.  The attempt fails but hey, points for trying.  The plot was too Metal Gear Solid-esque for my tastes, with the constant manipulation involving the villains.  Turns out an army of ROBots is being manipulated by the trio of evil (Bowser, King Dedede and Ganondorf), and that trio is being manipulated by Master Hand…who is being manipulated by some weirdo named Tabuu.  If reading that last sentence was stupid, imagine watching it unfold for 8 hours.

Instead of some weird thing going on with hands and things from other dimensions, go with something more simple.  Have Ganondorf plot world domination and make alliances with other villains (Bowser, King Dedede, Wolf).  From this alliance, the villians attempt to conquer the Nintendoworld!  Throw in Meta Knight and his ship and the villains would have a very mobile fortress.  The heroes will unite against the evil guys…and are helped by the treachery of the various villians (evil never tends to work as a team).  Alternatively, Dedede could be swapped with Ganondorf, because it’s reasonable the King of Dream Land would want to expand his influence into the realm of the waking.  All the worlds could be connected through dreams and the ending could be just that…all just a dream.  Very vague outlines but I wasn’t paid to storyline the game, much less throw around ideas.  That said, with the proper motivation (money), a better story would have been written.

That’s my major annoyance with the game.  Other minor nitpicks include lack of quality stages, crap online multiplayer, having some music appear randomly instead of being unlocked (I really want the Corneria theme for one of the Star Fox stages but it’s yet to appear) and the emphasis on new-age Pokemon.  Also, I don’t get why certain characters were changed or left out.  Why replace Mewtwo with Lucario?  Were Toon Link, Lucas and Wolf really necessary?  What’s the point of Mario having FLUDD if it does no damage?

One praise that was about to be heaped on Brawl were additions/tweaks to the gameplay.  New characters like Olimar, Meta Knight, Wario, King Dedede, Snake and Sonic are how new characters should be implemented.  One of the problems with Melee was that while the roster of characters was impressive, most of the new additions were clones of pre-existing ones (Ganondorf-Captain Falcon, Falco-Fox, Young Link-Link, Dr. Mario-Mario, Pichu-Pikachu, etc.).  Brawl still suffers from this problem, but to a lesser extent (Wolf-Fox/Falco, Lucas-Ness, even extends to items as the Golden Hammer isn’t different from the regular one).

Brawl is weird.  It’s the best game of the trio but it hasn’t held my interest like the first two (although
, I can not go back to playing either of the previous titles, thanks to all the new additions).  Perhaps it’s because I’ve overplayed the hell out of the previous games and Brawl isn’t exactly different.  Sure, there’s new characters/items/stages/etc., some of which change the gameplay, but overall, there’s a sense of “been there, done that.”  Overall, it’s a very good game but it won’t set the world on fire.  8.6 out of 10.

Mei Ling, Samus took her clothes off!


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