E3

The past three weeks have been rather eventful.  So eventful, in fact, that I haven’t said anything about my beloved video games.  Mini-Term, AP exams, banquet, scheduling, school, and upcoming controversial movies just take up time.  And to think I haven’t written a thing about E3…

For ye unenlightened, E3 is short for Electronic Entertainment Expo.  Its the world’s largest annual trade show for the video/computer game industry.  E3 is a great time for the industry to show off its latest technology, as Sony, Microsoft, and Nintendo demonstrated.  Sadly, I didn’t attend, as you have to be 18 or older…and its only open to industry professionals, celebrities, and journalists.  Hmm…maybe I should take journalism next year, go to E3, and tell them I’m from a “school journalism class” and see if they let me in?  Or I could see how fast I get escorted out of Los Angeles…

Anyway, here’s my critique on the three major console players, and what they showed this past week…

Wii the People

Y’know, despite all the crap Nintendo has thrown at the wall over the years, I’ve stuck with them.  Sticking with cartridges when Sony went with CDs, being a total bitch to third-party companies, delaying Zelda: Twilight Princess, I’ve stuck with Nintendo through just about everything.

But to name your next-generation console Wii, I don’t even know if I can defend Nintendo without sounding like a complete fuckhead.  Seriously, the fact they have to explain what the name means should show how bad of a name Wii is.  I knew Revolution was only a codename, but it made a helluva lot more sense than Wii.  With Revolution, I could understand Nintendo’s direction in the next-generation.  With Wii, Nintendo had to actually make a portion of their website just to explain what the hell they were thinking.

Oh, and as for the inevitable penis jokes that many gamers are/will be making, why not rename the system dIc?


As for the revolutionary TV remote (wii-mote?) of a controller, I’ll have to try it out once the Wii comes out.  I’ve heard negative reactions generally, but that’s probably because no one has played a video game with a remote control before.  Today’s awkwardness could be tomorrow’s second nature, but I guess wii all will have to wait…

I’m still pissed at the name, even if it was announced three weeks ago.  Wii might be only a name, but Nintendo believes this is working to their advantage.  Nintendo thinks the casual non-gamer will hear “Wii” and think,” Oh, Wii…as in We the people, so the name must mean the system is for everyone.”  The people will most likely see the name and make penis jokes…sad but true.

And for the record, Xbox 360 isn’t that great of a name either.  It does, however, beat the pants off of Nintendo’s Wii.

Play$tation 3:  Expensive!

Its official, Sony’s next-gen will launch in November…and will set back all financial plans at least $500.  $600 if you want more space on the hard drive.  Personally, I wouldn’t mind memory cards but oh well.  $600 is a little much for a next-gen system that’s barely got more hard drive than the original Xbox (Xbox has 50 GB hard drive, $600 PS3 has 60 GB, and the $500 one has 20 GB).

Two things got my attention, though.  One, PS1 games are coming to the PSP through wireless download.  Now, I have a legitimate reason to get a PSP.  My other interest is Metal Gear Solid 4:  Guns of the Patriots.  Hell, I can probably speak a little bit of Japanese since I’ve watched the trailer so much.  I like how most everyone who’s played a major role in the series (and is still alive) is reappearing.  I don’t like the idea that Liquid Snake may be in control of Revolver Ocelot.  I don’t like the idea that Snake is old and his body is decaying, but I’ll live.  He could at least lose the moustache…

Oh, and I have to express gratitude to Sony for not going with that Batman-esque gadget reject of a controller.

Xbox 360:  I Am Your Source…For Destroying Your Social Life

What social life?  And yes, I just quoted the Halo 3 trailer.  I’m pleased, but just a little ticked that the Covenant rule the Earth.  The whole “the odds are against one superbeing” plot is getting really old.  I love power, but having to fight a whole fleet of Covenant with only Marine support…yeah, it’d have been nice if Earth had been smart and not put all the Spartans on one colony.

Brothers in Arms:  Hell’s Highway looks great, and is on my wishlist.  I’m just impressed how impressive the game looks graphically.  Fable 2 is equally awesome, and might be the game Peter Molyneux envisioned the first Fable to be.  The other games I’m looking forward to can be found on a PS3, but since the Xbox 360 is out now, I’m thinking more people will get the games for the 360.

That’s just one side effect of the lack of first-party games.  Microsoft has Halo, Sony has nothing good that comes to mind.  I would have said Final Fantasy is Sony-exclusive but that might change in the future.  Then you’ve got Nintendo…and they are all first-party since they are going off the beaten path with their console.  I should of this under my rant on the Wii, but one can only imagine the sheer hell developers are going to have to go through making games on the Wii…

And that’s my two cents on E3.



Community service day was yesterday.  Quote of the year:  “I don’t know if you guys are talking about girls or communism.”

And I’m probably out most of the day.  I’m over Billy’s from noon to whenever, thanks to the world cultures project.  The class is okay, but the project sucks.  In addition to that, I’ve got CFL stuff to do.  A book report is due, and I’m really sick of reading about Christian family values.  If you believe that, that’s all well and good, but reading four 300+ page books in a semester on the subject just makes me bored.  Hell, I just opened up the book and looked at a chart.  Apparently, G-d provides protection from STDs and unplanned pregnancy.  I need to get ahold of these spiritual condoms the chart speaks of…

After that, more CFL crap with the marriage project.  My simulated wife and I need to describe our simulated wedding.  Its almost silly how expensive a wedding can get…  $600 just for rings!?  Does she really need a ring to show she’s married?  I can see it all now…women everywhere need a diamond (or a band of metal at least) on their finger to remind them they are married.  Oh well.  Women come and go, but porn is forever.

I’ll probably watch Exodus or go see United 93, and review them for the EAR.  Then I get to teach myself chemistry…or read some more of The Poisonwood Bible.  Neither sounds fun…

If I haven’t said I am glad junior year is coming to an end, I am now.

I can not be beaten, I can not be like you
I can not be otherwise, no matter what you do
I am the voice of broken glass
I am the voice to drive you mad at last
I am the truth, the liar turned around

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